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  • Writer's pictureArchuleta A. Chisolm

What Are You Pretending Not to Know?

For years I held several accounting jobs in corporate America. None of them ever really clicked for me. I busted my butt to obtain my undergrad and then a master’s degree. But I was never truly happy in any of my accounting jobs and often felt that there had to be something more in life.

My last corporate job laid me off after 8 years. Truth is, I was too comfortable there. It was a cushy job that I had no intention of leaving. I was upset about it for a couple of hours and then realized my prayers were being answered. My spirit ached for my purpose, knowing there was more out there for me. But I kept denying my spirit. Every time I did that, I killed a piece of my authenticity and lost some of my power.

It wasn’t until I got honest with myself that new possibilities started to come my way. First, I took inventory of my life. So much of the quality of our existence lies in the quality of the questions we ask ourselves. Poor questions gain unimportant answers. Questions like What’s wrong with me? get you nowhere. Why am I here? is a powerful question. What impact am I having in this moment? What and who am I allowing to impact me? What are my gifts and how can I use them to serve? What can I learn from this situation? These are revealing, connecting questions.

One of the most critical questions we’ll ever ask ourselves is What am I pretending not to know? Whenever we are in denial, we weaken our integrity and stop being true to ourselves. Whenever we operate from pretense, the price is high – we lose power and credibility not only with ourselves but also with others. You give up your freedom of self-expression.

When we are in denial, we are actually lying to ourselves. We are pretending something is the case rather than dealing with reality. It’s the art of the cover-up, except it’s not really covered-up, because we carry it.

Are you pretending not to know you hate your job? Are you pretending not to know you’re unhappy in your relationship? Are you pretending not to know those extra pounds you’re carrying are impeding your mobility and lowering your self-esteem? Are you pretending not to know you are strong and gifted so that other people feel comfortable?

A decision must be made to stop being in denial. We must first decide we are worth it! We matter, our voice matters, and our dreams are important. We don’t have to look far to know this. Look down at your fingertips. Out of the billions of people on the planet, you and only you have those fingerprints. You are a miracle – you’re magnificent and wonderful with a very specific purpose.

Discovering our greatest power starts with being honest with ourselves. We cannot shift what we are unwilling to acknowledge. When I stopped ignoring that I was miserable, I created a life I love. God could finally place me where I was supposed to be.

Each morning you wake up, you are gifted with two powerful things: the power of choice and the fact that you are unlimited. What will you choose to acknowledge today?


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