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  • Writer's pictureArchuleta A. Chisolm

Let Me Just Get The Door For You


In the year of our Lord 2023, The Cheesecake Factory is no longer an acceptable establishment for a date. Well, at least not to Monique Santos. She’s the woman on TikTok who refused to get out of the car when she and her date arrived at the restaurant.

Granted, this was not the original plan. According to Monique’s date, they missed their reservation at another restaurant because of her lateness. He made an executive decision, based on the situation, but Monique wasn’t having it.

She ignored his questions and concerns about being filmed and told the camera, “This is The Cheesecake Factory, y’all. This is a chain restaurant. Who takes someone who looks like this to a chain restaurant?”

In response to her question, her date asked, “You want to talk about it? I’m fine with talking about it, even in front of them.”

Monique’s argument was that she looked too good to be at a chain restaurant. Even more, she expected to be protected, covered, cherished, and treated well. She felt that she was doing what she was supposed to do on her end, as a woman.

He offered that he did have another restaurant picked out, however, she was over an hour late which made them lose the reservation. Monique doubled down, stating that she would die of embarrassment if she stepped foot in The Cheesecake Factory.

Drastic much?

Everybody is entitled to their standards and to eat where they want to eat. Okay, so you’re not impressed with his Plan B. I take no issue with that. If she doesn’t eat at Cheesecake Factory, then she shouldn’t have to eat there. But I believe there is a decent way to handle situations like this. And it’s not even about being a “pick me” and just being happy that a man asked you out. It’s just a way to be decent – and she was not, in my opinion.

Why couldn’t she have just asked if they could go somewhere else; suggest another restaurant that you do find suitable, or just say, “You know, I’m not a big Cheesecake Factory fan and maybe we can reschedule the date for the original place.”

I just didn’t see the need to embarrass this man. He didn’t curse you out or treat you bad; he was respectful and sweet through the entire ordeal. He didn’t take you through the drive-thru at Wendy’s. He didn’t try to play you. He tried to feed you, even though you were late. If he had acted like a jerk, then that's another story. So, what’s really the problem?

The truth is, if a man is interested and really wants to get to know you, he will plan a proper date. Don’t accept these coffee dates, please! Men that plan coffee dates don’t really like you. If a man asks you out, he has to think enough of you to take you on an appropriate date. Men, stop using the coffee date as a trial run to test a woman’s worthiness. It’s a cheap way to play games with women that no one has time for. Stop.

What’s also true is that Monique had no interest in her date anyway. If she did, she would have been willing to have dinner with him at The Cheesecake Factory.

I suppose Monique’s theatrics allowed her to gain some new followers on social media. And we can bet that her date received a few DM’s that wouldn’t mind some Chicken Piccata, an Apple Martini, and a slice of Banana Cream cheesecake (all bomb, by the way). We’ll just wish them both well.


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